Mad Cows...

According to my sister in Washington, current home of Mad Cow, either the grocery stores are completely, utterly out of eggs or they are pulling eggs off the shelf along with milk, butter, and anything bovine. Penguin Perspectives feels compelled to offer the guide to the differences between a cow, capable of mad cow infection, and a chicken, which is only slightly cranky at being roasted, for those grocers having a hard time with the concept.

Cow: 400 pound mammal, gives birth to live young
Chicken: 10 pound bird, lays eggs

Cow: No wings, four legs, hooves, lips
Chicken: Two wings, two legs, claws, beak

Cow: Rump Roast
Chicken: Drumsticks

Cow: Teats, toward rear end of animal, produce milk
Chicken: No teats anywhere on animal. Breast meat, but no milk.

Cow: Red meat
Chicken: White meat, dark meat, both unsuitable for making corned beef

Cow: one of many animals capable of producing the elements of cheese
Chicken: not one of many animals capable of producing any elements of cheese.

Any Questions?